So, I haven't posted in a long time. Lost my camera cable and I also honestly can't think of exciting things that have happened lately worth blogging about. Well, now I am in a mood and while this probably isn't worth it, I am blogging.
For the first time this is almost like a journal entry. I am not perfect, well know fact, but there is one thing I particularly dislike about myself. I cave. Someone confronts me and my brain, instead of thinking things through and standing up for my prospective, it goes immediately into panic mode. And I feel terrible and apologize all over myself and do everything I can to make whoever it is happy. Afterwards I always feel frustrated, nothing was reallyresolved besides me agreeing and apologizing. No one hears my perspective. This, I feel, makes people questions my integrity and my skills and talents. But, then I am hesitant to talk it out later because I am afraid I will just be perceived as making excuses for myself. It happened again today. I just wish people would realize there are two sides to every story and that everyone has different communication styles. How you think you came across to me may be very different than how I perceived what you were saying and vice versa.
There, I have gotten off my soap box for the time being. And no, this doesn't involve Chris. :) We have disagreements down to a science. I scream and yell for about 5 minutes while he sits quietly and once I'm through, we talk it out.
2 comments:
Does it have to do with the drama place...also known as "work"? I have been there before...I hate to say it but I would rather die than work in that kind of industry. I guess if it doesn't have to do with your work...at least you know how I feel about the Spa life. Sorry to "read more" into your diary entry. Glad to hear that you and Chris are good though :)
I know how you feel but I am usually the one who makes people feel uncomfortable. I say it and get it over with and two days later people are saying - "you know the other day, I really should have said this". I hope you learn to step out of the box and get it off your shoulders at the time. NEVER apologize for someone else being an idiot!
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